another baby?

WARNING: long post and lots of reading (sorry I couldn't think of any pics for this)

So, when are ya gonna have another baby?

This seems to be the question of late. About a month ago we started getting this question - a lot. Maybe because Jace is about to turn two, maybe because we don't talk about it much, who knows. It's kind of like the "are you dating anyone?" or the "when are you going to have kids?" questions. I guess it is just that time in our lives when people want to know.

I tend to be a little reserved when it comes to sharing some of the personal things in my life. I think this is for a couple of reasons: one, I don't really like to draw a lot of attention to myself and two, I think that I am protecting myself (you know, if I was pregnant but miscarried it would be easier to deal with if nobody knows, right?).

So, my answers to the "burning questions" from everyone have been fairly vague. Why should I put myself out there and be vulnerable to things not working out (I don't want people to know that my life isn't perfect, right?). After a lot of thinking and humbling and talking with Jared we decided that maybe the best option is to include our family and friends that really do care about us and want to be there for us.

We know that you want to be involved because you love us and want to help and how could you help if you don't know what's going on. With humility, I am realizing that we probably won't be able to do this alone. And most importantly, we really could use all of the extra prayers that we can get as this is all totally in the Lord's hands. We are just praying for the best and trusting in His plan.

So, what is the answer to the question?

We are planning on having another baby and soon. This is an excerpt from my journal on 8.4.08:

"Today Jared and I drove to the University of Utah for a cryo-preservation consultation. Jon and Aubrey were kind enough to watch Jace for us (they strongly discourage bringing kids to any of the appointments). A cryo cycle is a lot less invovled then a full IVF and we've already done it once before. The doctor said pregnancy rate with a cryo (meaning that the embryos are frozen not fresh - we have two in the freezer) is about 40% but we got pregnant once before so we are optimistic. Also, we talked about the placental abruption and the doctor feels like our miscarriage rate is normal since we did carry Jace to full-term (for those that don't know we did have a miscarriage after Jace - the result of a placental aprubtion which we also had with Jace - if that makes any sense). We are excited!"

We set up our "maternity insurance" here. Called the clinic when I started my period, had an ultrasound, sonohystogram, and a trial transfer and picked up my meds. Now I am taking birth control (which Jared blames for any disagreements that we have), pre-natal vitamins and giving myself a shot of Lupron everyday. Our Embryo transfer is scheduled for either Sept. 30 or Oct. 1.

So know you all know. If you really didn't care then that was a lot to read. We'll keep you updated and if you have any questions just let us know. Right now we are just praying that the embryos will thaw and be healthy and vital for the transfer. Thanks for all your support. We love you all.